How To Never Be Insecure Again

Is Everyone Looking At Me?

Imagine yourself walking into a room full of people. In this room there are some people you know and some you don’t know. As you are walking into this room what are the thoughts going through your mind?

  • “What do these people think of me?”
  • “Do these people find me attractive?”
  • “I hope I don’t embarrass myself.”
  • “What if I trip and fall over.”
  • “Do I walk weird?”
  • “I hope all these people aren’t looking at me.”

The list of things in our heads as we are walking into a room full of people are endless. We all have these insecure thoughts. Even if you aren’t insecure and actually quite secure in your confidence, you will still have some of these intrusive thoughts.

A Speck Of Dust In The Center Of The World

In our eyes, we all believe we are the center of the world. Although we will never admit this to anyone but we all feel like the world revolves around us. We think the earth doesn’t revolve around the sun, the universe revolves around you. No one is going to admit this openly because you will come off as an egotistical, narcissist human being who doesn’t care about anyone but themselves.

We are just a microscopic speck of dust in this world and maybe even smaller than that. If you don’t believe me, go take a ride in an airplane and get a window seat and look out the window. You will be amazed how small we really are. Buildings and cars seem like ants when thousands of feet in the sky. If you still don’t believe me then go study astronomy and you will how truly small we are compared to the rest of the universe.

Do you really think out of the billions of humans, animals, insects, and other species in the world you are the center of the world?

Why Is Everyone So Insecure?

The reason everyone is so insecure is because we think we are the center of existence. We think people do and say things because of us. You walk into a room and you think everyone is looking at you. You post a picture on instagram and you think people actually care. You post a tweet on twitter and you think people actually read it. I even make these articles thinking that all my friends and family will actually read it but really they don’t. The ones who read it are the people I don’t know and the ones who follow my Instagram.

I used to make these articles thinking everyone will read them but really that’s far from the truth. Only a select group of people actually read them, the rest of them just read the title and continues about their day.

You are insecure because you truly think that everything you do people are watching you and actually care what you do. Only the ones who truly love you, care what you do and are watching you. But you don’t care what they think. What a paradox.

Understand this concept and you will never be insecure again….

How To Never Be Insecure Again

To never be insecure again, all you have to do is understand this concept. The reason everyone is so insecure is because we all suffer what is called The Spotlight Effect.

Everyone is thinking the same thing you are. They are thinking about themselves. We all think we are in the spotlight at all times. We all are worried that other people are looking at us and judging us but really they aren’t. They are doing the exact same thing you are doing: worrying about if you are looking at them and judging them. No one cares what you look like, they only care about themselves. You walk into a room full of people and some glance up at you but they go back to thinking about themselves.

So as you are worrying about what others think of you, they are doing the exact same thing. They are worrying about what others think also. As you think you are in the spotlight, everyone around you thinks they are in the spotlight too, making no one truly in the spotlight. You have to have all eyes on you to be in the spotlight. But everyone’s eyes are mentally on themselves.

When you are alone, all your insecurity temporarily goes away because the spotlight effect is gone and you are no longer around others. You can’t have a spotlight if no one is around you to look.

I used to be self conscious when walking into room but after understanding that everyone is only thinking about themselves, I no longer care about other people’s opinions. Now I walk into a full room of people and don’t feel insecure or worry what others think of me because I realized everyone is worried about themselves. Really they are worried what you think of them.

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